Dear Crotchety Old Bitch,

Why do you have to spray fucking chemicals in your yard? Do the little itty bitty weeds irritate you that much? Come on! Didn’t you already have cancer once?

I just don’t know what you are thinking. If you’re just trying to keep us out of your yard, you’ve succeeded. The kids already said they will avoid your yard like the plague that it is.

Sincerely,
Young Pregnant Mama Who Hates When People Spray Their Lawns

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