Cross Your Heart

One-by-one, big, fat, salty tears rolled down my cheeks during the opening “marriage” montage of the Pixar film “Up”.   The notorious lump in the throat formed as I felt it vibrate and grow with each musical note.  That opening flash through Carl and Ellie’s life got me. And it got me good.

I think it was the depiction of the tenderness of marriage that got me.  All the milestones and moments along with the pitfalls and ever changing pace of life.  It was how, at first, [they] could run up the hill full of vigor, and how they later helped each other, carefully,  to the top.  It was how they lived and breathed one another.  It was romance.  It was hardship.  It was pure beauty.  It was the epitome of marriage and all we crave and desire.

Marriage is a twisted path on which we travel.  There are seasons.  Times we feel heat and sweat pouring, when it’s hard to breathe or feel comfort.  Times the brush is so thick that we get caught up in twisted vines, when it’s hard to get through or move.  Times when it’s bitterly cold, when the once raging fire is dissipating, begging to be poked and rekindled.   And there are times when the leaves fall off the proverbial trees, when we are exposed and allowed time to remember why we even set foot on the path; this path that wasn’t cut out for [us], but that [we] have traversed diligently.

Our children wouldn’t have understood why I was crying—so I held back—but deep within me there were pounding sobs.

After fifteen years of togetherness it’s easy to pass through the seasons allowing them to take their toll.  It’s in the autumn of my life , though, that I am reminded of the vulnerability of our hearts.   It’s when I can watch a four minute montage of a children’s movie, with tears streaking my face, that I can clearly recall that this path is indeed an adventure.  It’s the adventure of a lifetime, one that isn’t easy or always romantic, and it’s one that’s worth staying the course…seasons, scrapes, sweat, and all.

Michael,

I love you madly.  I hope you always sweat with me in the summer, put your cold feet on me in the winter, gaze at the blaring colors of the leaves with me in the fall, and hold steadfast as our flowers grow in the spring.

Yours,
Mishelle

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11 Responses to “Cross Your Heart”
  1. I could have written this post! (though not nearly as well, and not about your husband but, rather, mine. :) )

    I had the same exact reaction to the beginning of “Up”: it was so beautiful. And so was this post.

  2. 11.16.2009

    Oh, Mishi….

  3. I love you.
    yes. yes. yes.

  4. 11.16.2009

    that opening sequence was the best piece of moviemaking ever.

  5. 11.17.2009

    That was BEAUTIFUL!! I too cried during that montage. I hid it from the kids and Mike because he sooo would have made fun of me.

    Love this post, and you Mishi!

  6. I was on the fence about seeing this, but you’ve made up my mind. I’m grabbing my little one and running to the movie store right now.

  7. 11.17.2009

    I haven’t seen the movie yet, but I will… soon. And as a fifteen-year-love lady myself, I SO know the ups ad the downs, the ins and the outs. Rollercoaster waves. We’re in the down-phase right now, but I feel we’re headed up, Up, UP shortly. It’s necessary to have the times to compare to each other – how else would we know how good things are when they’re good? Or even great?! Necessary.

    I love you, lady. For reals.

  8. 11.17.2009

    *sniffle*

    So, so sweet. Yes, the movie made me feel that way about my darling one, too.

  9. 11.18.2009

    I cried my eyes out at the beginning of this film too – and then near the end – when he finally turns the page in her scrapbook expecting it to be empty. I was in floods again.

    I love the way it says to you “all life is an adventure – make it so, love every minute whether it’s a quiet moment on a hillside, or doing housework together, or climbing a mountain. Love is an adventure.”

    btw, first visit to your blog, love it!

  10. 11.20.2009

    lovely!

  11. So beautiful. Really hit home with this one, Mishi.


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